Friday, July 9, 2010

Outside Looking In

It had been a long hot morning.
I hitched a ride down the mountain
and got dropped off in a safe place to wait 5 hours for my next ride.

I had accomplished my mission. Now it was time to rest. It started to rain. I got under the tarp with my belongings. I had almonds left over and plenty of water. I was comfortable, strangely. I made a friend, Rama. We talked while I made a picture in the rocky ground. I emerged from the tarp when he drove up.
I sure did feel homeless, smelly and dirty.

I thought how I might be perceived. I know I am Gods child.
I know that the stars are a most beautiful ceiling...
that my body is my bed and the Earth my home.... Still I don't understand why...

The gathering was about to begin only a few 100 yards away from my tarp.
There would be finery and music and beautiful people dressed in pure white.
I was invited. I considered hosing off and putting on my last bit of clean clothing.
There was no draw, nothing inspiring me to show up... I don't know why.

"You are a princess," I reminded myself.
"You are sacred and beautiful, remember?"
We all are... still I don't know why, I choose cobwebs and crickets... soil over gold.